Lets face it, breaking up with your partner is an experience which more often than not is initially perceived as negative. Rightly so it is a difficult experience, as amendments need to be made to one’s identity. Due to the fact that plans which the couple had previously made for the future is now no longer the plan. This tends to leave individuals feeling perplexed as to what to do with their life, especially if the relationship spanned across across the years.
In the days that follow a break up, life seems tough, especially if one of the partners do not feel as if their wasn’t enough closure for them. This is where the grieving process kicks in, allow yourself to grieve the individual rather than immersing yourself in a rebound or other activities which might be harmful to you.
Remember that a relationship is something which is co-created between you and your partner. If it didn’t work out try dont be too hard on yourself as some tend to feel like it is entirely their fault, it was determined by both of your behaviours.
Speak to genuine friends who could perhaps disclose a similar experience which happened to them, this will aid you in understanding that this is somewhat of a normal process in adult life.
One thing which is interesting in breakups, is the fact that individuals have different perceptions about themselves and the world around them. It is an exciting time to start new ventures and to try previously unexplored activities in order to help renegotiate your identity.
Karl Grech is a counsellor. He offers counselling to both individuals and couples within Willingness. He can be contacted on karl@willingness.com.mt.