For all types of relationships to be successful and happy relationships, both people involved need to make an effort and invest their time. Long-distance relationships may require a little bit more of an effort to succeed but it is far from impossible!
Recent studies show that the majority of people in long-distance relationships are as satisfied and happy as couples that are not in a long-distance relationship. In fact, they reported that being away from each other made their feelings for their partner much more intense and made them feel closer to them.
Here you can find 7 ways to prepare yourself to be apart from your partner.
1. Communicate
This is definitely the most important thing to keep in mind. It is important that you know how your partner feels, and that they know how you feel. Like this you will both be able to respect each other and avoid disappointments. Agreeing that you are both going to make an effort to communicate when you are far away from each other is essential. When you’re in a long-distance relationship, sharing the boring and every-day details of your life can help bring you closer together and feel like you are supporting each other every step of the way.
2. Plan
Before you or your partner moves away, sitting down together to plan things needs to be done. You can find weekends when one of you can travel to visit the other in advance so that before you move away you will already know when you will be seeing each other again. It’s also a good idea to compare your work/school schedules so that you can have a better idea of when you can call each other during the week. Blocking out time for each other during the week is essential.
3. Agree on the Long-term Goal
It’s important to make decisions together on how long you are going to be apart for. Establishing that it is a temporary situation can help the relationship. At the same time, if you are not sure for how long you will need to be apart from each other it is good to be honest about this. This can help to avoid future disappointments.
4. Set Some Ground Rules
It’s no secret that long-distance relationships can test the trust you have in your partner. Setting some ground rules for your relationship whilst you are apart can give you both some peace of mind. For some couples agreeing to let each other know if they are out with friends or at a party can help. For others, agreeing to video call each other at least three times a week can help. It really depends on the needs of yourself and your partner. In this way you will both be aware of what your partner needs to feel safe and secure in your relationship.
5. Agree to Be Creative
Intimacy is important in any relationship. Whilst your ability to be physical with each other may be harder in a long-distance relationship, there are still many ways that you can keep this up! Discuss whether you will be comfortable with phone sex and being intimate with each other whilst on a video call. Explore what will work for you together – where there is a will, there’s a way!
6. Practice Independence
When you are living apart you are going to be doing everything separate from your partner. It’s good to start to become aware of this before introducing the distance into your relationship by investing time in yourself and your hobbies. It might feel more natural to spend every possible moment before one of you leaves together, but this might make it harder to be apart when it happens.
7.Appreciate the Positives
There are actually quite a lot of positive things that can come out of a long-distance relationship. Brainstorming what these will be together can help to get you both excited for this experience rather than dreading it!
that you can benefit from professional support on this issue you can reach out here.
Lisa Laspina is a Trainee Gestalt Psychotherapist who is currently working with Willingness. She is reading for a Masters in Gestalt Psychotherapy.
References
- Bonior, A. (2018, June 11). 10 Tips to Make a Long-Distance Relationship Work. Psychology Today. Retrieved January 5, 2022, from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/friendship-20/201806/10-tips-make-long-distance-relationship-work
- Kiiroo, A. A. (2018, October 31). Long-Distance Relationship Troubles. KIIROO®. Retrieved January 5, 2022, from https://www.kiiroo.com/blogs/articles/long-distance-relationship-troubles