How to Reconnect with Purpose When You Feel Lost
Whether you’re facing personal struggles or a career crossroads, losing your sense of meaning or purpose in life can feel overwhelming. Here’s how to find your purpose again.
If you feel directionless, uninspired, or unsure of your next steps, you’re not alone. Learn how to find your purpose when feeling lost using insights from coaching and psychology.
Understanding Purpose and Why It Matters
Purpose is the sense that our actions align with our values and goals, providing us with meaning and direction. Without purpose, we might feel adrift, unsure of our next steps. Having a sense of purpose is vital for overall well-being. Research consistently shows that individuals who feel a strong sense of purpose report better mental health, stronger relationships, and even physical health benefits (Ryff, 2014).
1) Losing Purpose as a Chance to Grow
However, life’s twists and turns can sometimes cause us to lose sight of our purpose, which may lead to feelings of emptiness or confusion. This feeling of being lost is often temporary and can be used as an opportunity for growth and self-discovery.
1. Acknowledge and Validate Your Feelings
The first step in reconnecting with your purpose is to acknowledge where you are. Many people feel pressure to have it all figured out or to immediately overcome feelings of doubt and uncertainty. However, denying or suppressing these feelings can lead to greater frustration. It’s okay to feel lost. It’s a natural part of the human experience.
1) Embrace Emotions to Discover What Needs Healing
As a coach, I encourage my clients to embrace these emotions without judgment. Name the emotion. Take time to reflect and sit with the discomfort. It can offer valuable insights into areas of your life that may need healing, change, or simply a fresh perspective.
2. Revisit Your Core Values
When you feel disconnected from your purpose, returning to your core values is a great starting point. Your values are the fundamental beliefs that guide your decisions, behaviours, and actions. Reflecting on what truly matters to you can reignite a sense of purpose.
Take a moment to ask yourself:
- What do I care about most in life?
- What principles guide my decisions?
- When have I felt truly fulfilled, and why?
1) Let Evolving Values Guide Your Current Purpose
It’s important to recognize that your values may evolve over time. Reassess them periodically to ensure they align with who you are today, rather than who you were years ago. Purpose is dynamic, and so are you.
3. Set Meaningful Goals
Once you’ve revisited your values, it’s time to translate them into actionable goals. Having a clear vision of what you want to achieve can help you regain focus and motivation. However, goals should not be purely external, such as career milestones or material achievements. True fulfillment often comes from goals that reflect personal growth, relationships, and contributions to others.
1) Set Personal Goals That Reflect Your True Values
Start by setting small, realistic goals that align with your values. The key is to ensure these goals are meaningful to you, rather than imposed by societal expectations or external pressures. As you accomplish these goals, you’ll gain a sense of progress that fuels your connection to your larger purpose.
4. Practice Self-Compassion and Patience
Reconnecting with your purpose is not an overnight process. It requires patience, effort, and kindness toward yourself. Many people who feel lost are also highly self-critical, which only deepens the feeling of disconnection.
1) Self-Compassion Supports Purpose and Resilience
One of the most transformative things you can do is practice self-compassion. Understand that it’s okay to be uncertain and that taking time to rediscover your purpose is part of the journey. Studies in positive psychology show that self-compassion is linked to greater well-being, resilience, and the ability to navigate life’s challenges (Neff, 2011).
5. Take Small, Intentional Steps
Action is a crucial part of reconnecting with your purpose. However, these actions don’t need to be monumental or perfect. Start small, whether it’s exploring a new hobby, taking a class, or having meaningful conversations with others. These small steps can gradually lead to bigger realizations and connections to your deeper purpose.
1) Stay Open and Curious About Purpose
It’s also important to be open to new experiences. Sometimes, we get too fixated on one path and forget that life’s purpose can manifest in different ways. Stay curious, and allow yourself the freedom to explore.
6. Seek Support from Others
It’s easy to feel isolated when you’re struggling to find your purpose, but know that you’re not alone. Talking to trusted friends, mentors, or even a coach can provide clarity and insight. They might see something in you that you haven’t yet discovered.
1) Let Others Help You Find Your Purpose
Sometimes, simply expressing your thoughts and feelings aloud can be a powerful tool for reconnecting with your purpose. The guidance and support of others can be a catalyst for self-discovery.
Conclusion: Embrace the Journey
Reconnecting with your purpose is a deeply personal journey, and while it may feel daunting at times, it is also a chance to explore new dimensions of yourself. Remember, feeling lost is not a permanent state. It’s an invitation to reassess, reflect, and recalibrate. By embracing your core values, setting meaningful goals, practicing self-compassion, and taking intentional actions, you’ll gradually rediscover your purpose and move forward with renewed clarity and confidence.
Written by Christine Hili
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Christine Hili is an integrative coach at Willingness. She graduated from the University of Malta with an Honours degree in Psychology and is currently pursuing an ICF Diploma in Integrative Coaching. She is passionate about integrative coaching, believing it helps individuals achieve their personal and professional goals by addressing topics like confidence, relationships, time management, and stress management.
References
Neff, K. D. (2011). Self-compassion: The proven power of being kind to yourself. William Morrow.
Ryff, C. D. (2014). Psychological well-being revisited: Advances in the science and practice of eudaimonia. Psychotherapy and Psychosomatics, 83(1), 10-28. https://doi.org/10.1159/000353263