How Your Relationship with Yourself Shapes Your Love Life
What kind of relationship do you have with yourself? Have you ever thought about it? If not, it is about time because your relationship with yourself is the foundation for your relationships with others – it directly impacts overall relationship happiness.
The Only Proper Way To Build A Healthy Relationship
Healthy relationships require skills such as setting boundaries, assertiveness, willingness to cooperate, conflict resolution, and respect. It is not always easy to develop and maintain a healthy relationship with yourself. Just like with any potential partner, it takes time to get to know and love yourself. It also takes commitment and quiet time for reflection.
Speaking of our love life, we generally allow others to treat us how we believe we deserve to be treated.
So here is how your relationship with yourself shapes your love life
When we feel insecure, we compare ourselves to others and think we are not good enough. A good relationship with yourself includes confidence in your abilities and what you bring to the table. When you see your worth, others are more likely to see it, too.
How You’d Benefit From Knowing Who You Are As A Person
Knowing who you are as a person, including your character traits, wants, and needs, will make communicating with others easier. When you understand yourself, you speak up for yourself about your wants, needs, and feelings, which sets the tone for whoever is listening.
A Healthy Relationship With Yourself Can Really Help
Having a healthy relationship with yourself brings inner peace and contentment. You will not depend on someone else to achieve this, so you automatically stop self-sacrificing to make your relationships work; you feel no need to control your partner to feel better about yourself. You will, instead, look for someone on the same wavelength—not a missing piece but an additional piece to contribute to each other’s overall fulfilment in life.
Embrace Your Flaws For How They’ve Made You The Person You Are
Accepting yourself the way you are without judging your flaws is hard work. Being human, we know that everybody makes mistakes and nobody is perfect. If you can accept your flaws and past mistakes as part of your learning experiences, you will love yourself more, and others will likely do the same. You will choose someone who loves you the way you want to be loved, including the flaws and past mishaps.
Other Benefits That Come With Maintaining A Healthy Relationship With Yourself
A healthy relationship with yourself will give you an optimistic outlook on life and attract people with similar views and values. This comes with healthy boundaries—offering kindness and forgiveness to yourself and respecting yourself for who you are and have become will lead to you not accepting anything less from a partner.
Self-Care’s In The Picture As Well
Loving yourself includes self-care. How you care for yourself, including quality time with yourself and friends and small treats, will show your partner that it is essential and healthy to have a still individual life to keep the balance in the relationship. By caring about yourself, you are more likely to attract a partner who cares about themselves and you, too.
How A Healthy Relationship With Yourself Impacts The Way You Proceed With Your Dating And Love Life
Developing a good and healthy relationship with yourself sometimes means becoming more selective in your dating and love life. You might find yourself walking away from certain connections because they won’t feel like a good match anymore. Trust the process and believe in your ability to make good long-term decisions based on self-love, respect, and care.
Conclusion
If you grew up in a dysfunctional family system, your self-confidence might be impacted. Developing a healthy relationship with yourself is easier said than done. If you struggle with loving or liking yourself, seek professional support.
If you think that you can benefit from professional support on this issue, you can reach out here.
Franziska Richter is a transcultural counsellor with the Willingness Team, offering counselling sessions to individuals and couples. She is particularly interested in sexuality, relationship issues, trauma and general mental health.
References
https://www.thehappinessdoctor.com/blog/dating-relationship-self-love
