16 May 2018 willingness

In the previous blog, we shared some ideas to help with long distance relationships such as communicating in different forms, surprising each other, talking about the future and sharing a hobby. In this blog we will share what NOT to do.

 

Don’t of long distance relationships:

 

  1. It is very important that both partners know that they are in this relationship 100%, don’t go into a long distance relationships thinking that you will see how it goes. This attitude will surely back fire since these types of relationships are harder and need more commitment and work.
  2. Don’t listen to other people who tell you that long distance relationships don’t work. If you listen and partly believe it, then you might subconsciously try to sabotage your relationship and prove that this belief is true.
  3. Don’t do anything that can damage the trust you have with your partner. This is a tricky one, but it’s important for example not to be caught in a lie, even if it is an innocent one, this will put doubt in your partner’s mind and question whether they can trust you. This point is not about jealous partners who want to control, this can happen to any couple even those who have no jealousy and have full trust. Distance can play tricks on the mind and losing trust will almost always end the relationship.
  4. Don’t let your own anxieties and insecurities affect the relationship. For your own sake it is important to work through and find ways to alleviate your anxiety, this will in turn help with the relationship. Reducing your own anxiety is not only beneficial to you on a personal level but will also bring a sense of relief and safety in a long distance relationship.

 

In conclusion, there are a few things to keep in mind if you are to go into a long distance relationship, most importantly be in it 100% and talk about the future together, share daily activities and keep each other updated. Make sure you don’t believe other people who try to sabotage your relationship and give your partner the opportunity to trust you, and finally don’t let your own insecurities and anxieties come in the way.

 

Dana Scicluna Azar is a relationship and sex advisor at willingness. She offers therapy to both individuals and couples. She can be contacted on dana@willingness.com.mt.