What is alexithymia?

From time to time, clients describe struggling with emotions in unusual ways, feeling detached or emotionally absent entirely. Additionally, some individuals report experiencing emotions that feel inauthentic, leaving them disconnected from typical emotional responses. Moreover, they may describe feeling as though they never possessed genuine emotions in the first place. Furthermore, certain clients explain recognising emotions without clarity, uncertain about identifying or responding to them appropriately. Ultimately, these experiences highlight the complexity of alexithymia, where emotions feel distant, unclear, or disconnected from authentic inner experiences.

Understanding Alexithymia: What Is Alexithymia and How It Affects Emotions?

What many individuals may experience is alexithymia, a relatively unknown condition characterised by difficulties identifying and expressing emotions. Additionally, experts debate whether alexithymia should be classified as a personality trait, mental disorder, or medical symptom. Moreover, people with alexithymia often struggle to understand their own emotions, let alone communicate them effectively. Furthermore, challenges extend to recognising and describing the emotions of others, complicating social interactions and relationships significantly. Consequently, individuals may appear emotionally detached or unresponsive, creating barriers to connection in social situations. Ultimately, these difficulties often result in isolation and loneliness, making relationships harder to build and maintain.

How Alexithymia Manifests in Daily Life

To illustrate it clearly, alexithymia manifests differently depending on each individual and the severity of their condition. Additionally, people may struggle to recognise emotions, finding it difficult to connect feelings with specific life experiences. Moreover, they can experience challenges when attempting to verbally describe emotions, often lacking the language to express themselves. Furthermore, individuals might display limited imagination or reduced ability to engage in fantasy and creative thinking. Equally, difficulty understanding the emotions of others often creates challenges in forming meaningful and supportive relationships. Ultimately, these behaviours highlight alexithymia’s complexity, with symptoms varying widely across individuals and impacting daily life significantly. Some behaviours include:

I) Troubles with Recognising, Understanding, and Describing Emotions

People experiencing alexithymia often struggle to identify emotions, making it difficult to express their feelings accurately. Additionally, these individuals may find themselves unsure of what specific emotions they are experiencing at given times. Moreover, they frequently have trouble putting their emotional experiences into words others can easily understand. Furthermore, vague descriptions such as “good” or “bad” are commonly used instead of precise emotional terms. Equally, words like “excited” or “happy” often remain inaccessible in their daily emotional vocabulary. Similarly, terms such as “disappointed” or “sad” may not be used to express true feelings. Ultimately, these difficulties highlight alexithymia’s impact on communication, emotional awareness, and overall social connection with others.

II) Understanding Alexithymia: Limited Imagination and Creativity

Alexithymia often impacts a person’s ability to imagine or visualise scenarios clearly, limiting their creative potential in various activities. Additionally, individuals may find it difficult to engage in imaginative thinking, reducing opportunities for innovation and expressive exploration. Moreover, tasks such as writing, drawing, or storytelling can become particularly challenging due to restricted creative processing skills. Furthermore, limited imaginative ability may hinder problem-solving skills, as visualisation often supports creative solutions and flexible thinking. Ultimately, alexithymia restricts creativity, influencing personal growth, emotional expression, and overall capacity for self-discovery and development.

III) Lack of Empathy for Others in Daily Life

Seeing as people with alexithymia struggle with their own emotions, empathising with others often becomes extremely difficult. Additionally, this difficulty can make them appear detached or indifferent, even when they do not intend to seem uncaring. Moreover, challenges with interpreting social cues often prevent them from responding appropriately to emotional situations involving others. Furthermore, this lack of empathy can create distance in relationships and hinder the development of meaningful connections. Equally, people may misinterpret their behaviour as coldness, misunderstanding the true challenges posed by alexithymia. Ultimately, these struggles highlight how alexithymia affects emotional reciprocity, reducing understanding and complicating everyday social interactions.

IV) Poor Social Skills and Everyday Challenges

The previous point highlights how alexithymia significantly affects building and maintaining relationships due to difficulties in social interaction. Additionally, individuals often struggle to express themselves clearly, making it challenging for others to understand their emotions and intentions. Moreover, these barriers frequently lead to misunderstandings, reducing opportunities for forming meaningful connections and sustaining supportive relationships.

Understanding Alexithymia: Challenges in Diagnosing the Condition

There is currently no single test that can definitively diagnose alexithymia in individuals accurately. Instead, professionals rely on structured interviews, questionnaires, and clinical observations to gather important diagnostic information. Moreover, these assessments explore how well individuals recognise, understand, and articulate their emotions in various contexts. Additionally, evaluations help identify difficulties with emotional expression and awareness that may suggest alexithymia. Furthermore, mental health practitioners combine different methods to ensure accuracy and rule out alternative explanations. Ultimately, diagnosis requires careful assessment, professional expertise, and consideration of individual differences in emotional functioning.

Different Experiences of Living with Alexithymia

Importantly, not every individual with alexithymia will display identical symptoms, as severity and behaviours can vary significantly between people. Additionally, some individuals may experience milder forms while others struggle with more severe challenges impacting emotional expression and relationships. Moreover, people with alexithymia can develop coping strategies, enabling them to function effectively despite difficulties identifying and expressing emotions.

Understanding Alexithymia: Can It Be Treated Effectively?

Treatment for alexithymia frequently includes therapy, with research supporting approaches like cognitive-behavioural therapy and emotion-focused therapy. Additionally, these evidence-based interventions empower individuals to identify, recognise, and label emotions more effectively within daily experiences. Moreover, therapy supports the development of healthy emotional expression, enabling people to communicate feelings constructively and confidently. Furthermore, structured sessions help individuals build resilience, enhance coping strategies, and reduce emotional detachment significantly over time. Equally, therapy provides opportunities to strengthen social skills, supporting healthier and more meaningful interpersonal connections. Ultimately, consistent therapeutic practice fosters emotional growth, improved self-awareness, and stronger relationships with others.

Final Thoughts on Understanding Alexithymia

To wrap things up, alexithymia creates challenges in recognising and expressing emotions, often leading to difficulties in personal relationships and wellbeing. Additionally, this condition may develop early in life or be acquired later due to psychological or physical stress-related factors. Moreover, individuals with alexithymia frequently experience both physical and mental health symptoms that significantly impact overall daily functioning. Ultimately, with appropriate treatment and support, people can learn emotional awareness, strengthen management skills, and build fulfilling, supportive relationships.

Written by Branka Mlinar

If you think that you can benefit from professional support on this issue you can reach out here.

Branka Mlinar is a psychologist and Gestalt therapist offering psychotherapy and counselling to adolescent and adult individuals. She’s mostly worked with problems of anxiety, interpersonal and relationship issues, procrastination, work-related stress, trauma, and grief.

References

Kooiman, C. G., Spinhoven, P., & Trijsburg, R. W. (2002). The assessment of alexithymia: A critical review of the literature and a psychometric study of the Toronto Alexithymia Scale-20. Journal of Psychosomatic Research, 53(6), 1083-1090.

Taylor, G. J., Bagby, R. M., & Parker, J. D. A. (1997). Disorders of Affect Regulation: Alexithymia in Medical and Psychiatric Illness. Cambridge University Press.