Social Anxiety and Gestalt Therapy

Being concerned with what others think of us is a universal human experience across many different social situations and life contexts. However, in appropriate amounts, this caution helps individuals monitor and regulate their behavior according to what is socially acceptable and expected. When this caution becomes excessive and overwhelming, it is experienced as anxiety and fear, no longer serving an adaptive or helpful function.

Existential Experience in Social Anxiety

Social anxiety involves a persistent fear of being negatively judged, criticized, or closely observed by others. Additionally, this fear can significantly interfere with daily functioning, affecting relationships, work, and participation in everyday social situations. Moreover, individuals often attempt to avoid anxiety-provoking situations in order to reduce discomfort and prevent perceived negative evaluation. However, when avoidance is not possible, individuals may endure these situations while experiencing significant distress and heightened emotional discomfort. Consequently, this ongoing pattern can reinforce anxiety, making social situations increasingly difficult to navigate over time. Ultimately, social anxiety can limit personal growth and wellbeing, highlighting the importance of seeking appropriate support and therapeutic intervention.

Existential Experience and Gestalt Therapy Understanding

The following section will explore the understanding and approach of Gestalt therapy towards social anxiety in greater depth and clarity. Additionally, it will consider how this therapeutic approach views the individual’s experience within their environment, relationships, and present moment awareness. Consequently, this perspective aims to support individuals in developing greater awareness, self-understanding, and more adaptive ways of relating to social situations:

1.1) Understanding the Inner Critical Voice

Within social anxiety, the feared negative judgement from others often reflects an internal harsh and critical judgement towards oneself. Additionally, this self-critical attitude can lead individuals to feel small, unlikeable, or as though they are doing something wrong. Moreover, remaining immersed in this internal criticism fosters anxiety and creates emotional distance between individuals and others in social situations. This anxiety can prevent individuals from interacting freely, limiting connection, expression, and comfort within everyday social experiences.

1.2) Confronting Internalized Beliefs

Needless to say, this critical attitude towards oneself can significantly diminish a person’s sense of self-worth and overall self-esteem over time. Additionally, Gestalt therapy offers a safe and supportive space where individuals may begin experimenting with healthier and more compassionate ways of relating to themselves. Consequently, this process requires time, effort, and emotional energy, and often involves working through introjects that shape beliefs, behaviors, and emotional responses.

2.1) Existential Experience and Introjected Beliefs

Introjects are beliefs taken from others, which individuals adopt as their own without questioning or critically reflecting on them fully. Additionally, many introjects originate from caregivers during childhood, some helping individuals learn safety, behavior, and boundaries while growing up. Moreover, individuals often accept these beliefs without analyzing whether they agree with them or whether they truly suit their needs. Furthermore, these introjects can shape self-perception, influencing how individuals think about themselves, their abilities, and their sense of worth. Introjects may include messages like “don’t be loud” or “you are lazy”, which can impact confidence and behavior.

2.2) Existential Experience in Healing Processes

An accumulation of negative introjects may result in a critical inner voice, which can distress individuals and limit their ability to interact freely. Additionally, in therapy, individuals can explore this critical attitude, becoming more aware of how these introjects influence thoughts, emotions, and behaviour. Moreover, this growing awareness initiates a process of change, allowing individuals to better understand the origins and impact of their internal dialogue. Furthermore, individuals may begin experimenting with engaging in dialogue with this critical voice, gradually questioning and challenging its validity and influence. This process supports individuals in developing a more compassionate relationship with themselves, reducing distress and enabling more authentic and confident interactions.

2.3) Pathways to Self-Compassion

Learning to speak to ourselves with compassion is essential in challenging and softening a deeply rooted self-critical attitude. Additionally, this compassionate approach allows individuals to respond to themselves with understanding, rather than judgement, in moments of difficulty and emotional distress. Consequently, developing this way of relating to oneself supports emotional wellbeing, fostering greater self-acceptance, resilience, and more balanced interactions with others.

3.1) Existential Experience of Externalized Self-Criticism

Other aspects of working with social anxiety include projections, where individuals disown parts of themselves and attribute them to others. Additionally, projections are natural and often unconscious mechanisms that influence how individuals interpret interactions, situations, and the behavior of others. Moreover, social anxiety can lead individuals to project their critical inner voice onto others, assuming negative judgements are coming externally. Consequently, individuals may believe others see them as incompetent or unlikeable, when these thoughts reflect their own self-critical attitudes.

3.2) Existential Experience of Anxiety and Relief

While feared social situations do not present actual physical danger, the distress experienced by individuals can still feel deeply overwhelming. Additionally, this emotional distress can significantly impact daily functioning, relationships, and overall wellbeing when left unaddressed over extended periods. Moreover, individuals may struggle to understand these reactions, especially when the perceived threat does not fully match the situation. Consequently, providing time, space, and emotional support within a therapeutic context can help individuals process and regulate these experiences. This process allows individuals to reduce distress, develop deeper insight, and engage more freely within social situations over time.

Final Thoughts

To conclude, understanding social anxiety through a Gestalt lens highlights the importance of awareness, self-compassion, and exploring one’s lived experience. This approach supports individuals in challenging internalized beliefs and developing healthier ways of relating to themselves. Consequently, with time, support, and intentional reflection, individuals can reduce distress and engage more freely within social and relational experiences.

Existential Experience: Written by Amber Tabone

Amber Tabone practices Gestalt Psychotherapy with individuals and couples at Willingness, currently reading for a Master’s in Psychotherapy. She’s developed an interest in working with relationships, gender, and sexuality. This is due to her experience with families and domestic violence issues.

References

Association, A. P. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed.). Arlington. Retrieved 9 10, 2020

Gilbert, P. (2001). Evolution and Social Anxiety. Psychiatric Clinics. doi:https://doi.org/10.1016/S0193-953X(05)70260-4

Stevens, A. (2016, 10 16). Alexandra Stevens Therapy. Retrieved 9 10, 2020, from http://alexandrastevenstherapy.com/blog/2016/10/16/3-steps-to-beating-social-anxiety