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Sometimes some partners feel like it can be difficult to discuss certain issues with their male partner. Below are some tips to help communicate with one’s partner:

  • Help to create a safe environment
  • It is very important to create an environment in which he feels safe discussing anything with you. If he feels threatened or intimidated of specific consequences, the probability of him discussing certain issues with his partner will decrease.
  • It is important to emphasize a way forward when discussing issues. As opposed to getting stuck on the emotional element of the situation.
  • It is important to not make him feel judged or misperceived on an issue, as this closes down the communication between the couple.
  • Don’t force the issue
  • Let the issue come naturally in a conversation. It is not recommended to corner someone into a conversation, without them wanting to take the conversation there.
  • Focus on his strengths
  • Complement him about his strengths, this facilitates conversation by creating a safe space for him to communicate. This safe space creates a place where he feels understood.
  • Talk whilst doing something else
  • Sometimes it may be beneficial to discuss an issue whilst he is doing something else. The lack of eye contact helps communication, this may help conversation as it may be perceived as easier to discuss certain topics without having to look at his partner directly in their eyes.
  • Externalise the issue
  • It may be beneficial to start discussing an issue which is not directed at your partner,

For example – “did you see what happened at …….”. Then try to discuss how you feel about it in order to help initiate a conversation about how he might feel about the particular topic.

It is also worth noting that if communication keeps arising as an issue in your relationship it would be beneficial to discuss it with a mental health professional.

References:

Karl Grech is a counsellor. He offers counselling to both individuals and couples within Willingness. He can be contacted on karl@willingness.com.mt or call us on 79291817.